How many times in the past year have you found yourself thinking ‘This isn’t the way it was supposed to go’? This unemployment thing has taken us by surprise. Not only the layoffs and cutbacks but also the length of time it’s taking to find that next job. And to make matters worse, the salaries out there have, in many, many cases been cut as well. So, no, this isn’t the way it was supposed to go. Especially if you’ve done everything you were supposed to do. Education, played well with others, learned the ins and outs of your industry.

For men this has been a particularly tough time. I work with a lot of men and for them it’s particularly difficult to talk with others about what they are looking for in this next go round. Forget about talking about the disappointment and resentment that this downturn has created, we know that’s rough to do. Reaching out to that network isn’t easy. Jeffrey Zaslow, in a recent Wall Street Journal article, wrote about the way men do friendship. They don’t sit around commiserating with their buds about their unemployment, issues at home, etc…they’ll quietly deal with their problems over sharing their pain.